I have zero pictures for this because I was freaking out in the moment. Of course I wasn't thinking about pictures!
November 7, 2017
I experienced my first ever panic attack. Here's what happened that led up to the event.
At around 2pm I went to the gym for the first time in weeks. I had a "bang" energy drink for the first time since I've started my chemo treatments. After the gym, I didn't really drink a lot of water or eat anything. I went back to work.
Around 6:00pm my boyfriend came to pick me up from work. We went to foodland because I was going to make us spaghetti for dinner, but I really wanted cheese and garlic bread. As we were driving I felt very nauseous, thinking it was because I haven't eaten anything since lunch (11:30am). I got a rice krispy from foodland as well as the other items I needed. On the way home, I ate half the rice krispy. I still felt nauseous and I began to have a headache on the back of my head.
We got home at around 6:30pm. I had just put a pot of water to boil on the stove and asked my boyfriend to get the spaghetti box out. All at once I felt extremely light headed, like I could feel the oxygen not going to my brain. I felt my heart beating way too fast and I could breathe properly. I told my boyfriend that something was wrong with me and that I needed to get to the hospital. I walked to the car and I remember it being blurry and I was just panicking. I literally thought I was going to die.
On the way to the hospital, I stuck my head out of the car to try and calm down. It helped a lot.
When we got to the hospital, they checked me in and I was shaking a lot. My blood pressure was very high and my heart rate was up at 90bpm. My normal resting heart rate is between 55-60bpm.
They put me into a room and started an IV and took blood samples. I told them how I was feeling, and at some points while talking, I couldn't breathe which made me freak out even more. A nurse came in and put a heart monitor on my chest, and another nurse did an EKG to make sure I wasn't having a heart attack or an arrhythmia. The doctor finally came in and asked if I wanted something to calm me down, and I agreed. He said everything looked normal and I was probably just having a panic attack. The nurse gave me the medicine through IV to calm me down, which kicked in super quick!
We were at the hospital for about three hours. When we finally left, we got something to eat. I didn't really eat much because I was super tired from the medicine.
The next day, I still felt jittery and my heart rate still felt like it was super high. I had a headache in the back of my head all day and I felt like at any moment, I could have another attack. I went to see a doctor and she prescribed anti anxiety medication.
It honestly felt like I was going to die and I'm so glad it was just a panic attack. I can't tell what is a side effect to my treatment or if there's something actually wrong. In this case, I think what set me off was the energy drink and not having any water to drink for four hours after that. It's the scariest thing when you don't know what's going on with your body.